Battle of Wits

Battle of Wits (Secret Lair Drop)
Anna Pavleeva

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

"You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders." —Vizzini

Battle of Wits (Odyssey)
Mark Brill

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

The wizard who reads a thousand books is powerful. The wizard who memorizes a thousand books is insane.

Battle of Wits (Magic 2013)
Jason Chan

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

There is no loftier ambition than the pursuit of knowledge.

Battle of Wits (The List)
Jason Chan

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

There is no loftier ambition than the pursuit of knowledge.

Battle of Wits (Ninth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

The wizard who reads a thousand books is powerful. The wizard who memorizes a thousand books is insane.

Battle of Wits (Ninth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

The wizard who reads a thousand books is powerful. The wizard who memorizes a thousand books is insane.

Multani's Acolyte (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Echo {G}{G} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, draw a card.

Aven Fogbringer (Judgment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying When this creature enters, return target land to its owner's hand.

"I cover the land with blankets and it sleeps."

Zuran Spellcaster (Coldsnap Theme Decks)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: This creature deals 1 damage to any target.

"A mage must be precise as well as potent, cautious as well as clever." —Zur the Enchanter

Dusk Imp (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying

It despises humans and squirrels and beasts and dwarves and cephalids . . . well, it despises just about everything.

Birds of Paradise (World Championship Decks 2002)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Mana Seism (Champions of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Sacrifice any number of lands, then add that much {C}.

"It is the nature of humanity not to worry about tomorrow, especially when there's a good chance they won't live to see the end of today." —Kiku, Night's Flower

Selesnya Sagittars (Ravnica: City of Guilds)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Reach (This creature can block creatures with flying.) This creature can block an additional creature each combat.

"What's their strike range, you ask? Let's put it this way: sagittars aim their bows using *maps*." —Otak, Tin Street shopkeep

Cyclopean Mummy (Fourth Edition Foreign Black Border)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature dies, exile it.

Pteron Ghost (Darksteel)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Sacrifice this creature: Regenerate target artifact.

Defending to the death isn't always enough.

Mind's Eye (Mirrodin)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever an opponent draws a card, you may pay {1}. If you do, draw a card.

"Ideas drift like petals on the wind. I have only to lift my face to the breeze."

Pyknite (Ice Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature enters, draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.

"Never cross a Pyknite, if you value your scalp." —Lovisa Coldeyes, Balduvian Chieftain

Neurok Familiar (Mirrodin)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying When this creature enters, reveal the top card of your library. If it's an artifact card, put it into your hand. Otherwise, put it into your graveyard.

Fen Stalker (Prophecy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This creature has fear as long as you control no untapped lands. (It can't be blocked except by artifact creatures and/or black creatures.)

As silent as a shadow, and just as hard to flee.

Spirit Shackle (Fourth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped, put a -0/-2 counter on it.

Cyclopean Mummy (Renaissance)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature dies, exile it.

Arcades Sabboth (Chronicles)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Arcades Sabboth unless you pay {G}{W}{U}. Each untapped creature you control gets +0/+2 as long as it's not attacking. {W}: Arcades Sabboth gets +0/+1 until end of turn.

Combat Medic (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{1}{W}: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to any target this turn.

"Although Icatia's Combat Medics borrowed much of their knowledge from other societies, their skills were their own." —*Sarpadian Empires, vol. VI*

Rohgahh of Kher Keep (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may pay {R}{R}{R}. If you don't, tap Rohgahh and all creatures named Kobolds of Kher Keep, then an opponent gains control of them. Creatures you control named Kobolds of Kher Keep get +2/+2.

Blademane Baku (Betrayers of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever you cast a Spirit or Arcane spell, you may put a ki counter on this creature. {1}, Remove X ki counters from this creature: For each counter removed, this creature gets +2/+0 until end of turn.

Henge of Ramos (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Add {C}. {2}, {T}: Add one mana of any color.

It is the hub. We are the wheel. —Dryad saying

Ghosts of the Damned (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Target creature gets -1/-0 until end of turn.

The voices of the dead ring in the heart long after they have faded from the ears.

Righteous Fury (Starter 1999)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Destroy all tapped creatures. You gain 2 life for each creature destroyed this way.

Plow Under (World Championship Decks 2000)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Put two target lands on top of their owners' libraries.

To renew the land, plow the land. To destroy the land, do nothing. —Druids' saying

Sulfur Vent (Invasion)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {B}. {T}, Sacrifice this land: Add {U}{R}.

Shock (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Shock deals 2 damage to any target.

"I love lightning! It's my best invention since the rock." —Toggo, goblin weaponsmith

Icatian Infantry (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{1}: This creature gains first strike until end of turn. {1}: This creature gains banding until end of turn. (Any creatures with banding, and up to one without, can attack in a band. Bands are blocked as a group. If any creatures with banding you control are blocking or being blocked by a creature, you divide that creature's combat damage, not its controller, among any of the creatures it's being blocked by or is blocking.)

The Icatian army easily repelled early surprise attacks by the Orcs on border towns like Montford.

Cyclopean Mummy (Fourth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature dies, exile it.

The ritual of plucking out an eye to gain future sight is but a curse that enables the living to see their own deaths.

Timmy, Power Gamer (Unglued)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{4}: You may put a creature card from your hand onto the battlefield.

"Just wait till I get my Leviathan . . . ."

Spirit Shackle (Renaissance)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped, put a -0/-2 counter on it.

Arcades Sabboth (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Arcades Sabboth unless you pay {G}{W}{U}. Each untapped creature you control gets +0/+2 as long as it's not attacking. {W}: Arcades Sabboth gets +0/+1 until end of turn.

Krosan Wayfarer (Judgment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Sacrifice this creature: You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield.

"The Krosan Forest lives, and druids are its seeds." —Seton, centaur druid

Avalanche Riders (World Championship Decks 2000)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

Icatian Javelineers (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This creature enters with a javelin counter on it. {T}, Remove a javelin counter from this creature: It deals 1 damage to any target.

Birds of Paradise (World Championship Decks 2002)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Battlefield Percher (Nemesis)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying This creature can block only creatures with flying. {1}{B}: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn.

Invigorating Boon (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever a player cycles a card, you may put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.

The Mirari's echoes rang in the scouts' minds long after they had returned from the Krosan Forest.

Beast (Magic Player Rewards 2004)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Rainbow Crow (Invasion)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {1}: This creature becomes the color of your choice until end of turn.

Children claim no two feathers are exactly the same color, then eagerly gather them for proof.

Mental Discipline (Urza's Destiny)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{1}{U}, Discard a card: Draw a card.

Barrin drowned his doubts about Urza's project by delving ever deeper into its details.

Ensouled Scimitar (Fifth Dawn)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{3}: This artifact becomes a 1/5 Spirit artifact creature with flying until end of turn. (Equipment that's a creature can't equip a creature.) Equipped creature gets +1/+5. Equip {2} ({2}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Volcanic Hammer (Starter 1999)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Volcanic Hammer deals 3 damage to any target.

Fire finds its form in the heat of the forge.

Draconian Cylix (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{2}, {T}, Discard a card at random: Regenerate target creature.

"There is no gain without sacrifice." —Icatian proverb

Wings of Aesthir (Ice Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and has flying and first strike.

"For those of courage, even the sky holds no limit." —Arnjlot Olasson, Sky Mage

Spirit Shackle (Fourth Edition Foreign Black Border)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped, put a -0/-2 counter on it.

Elvish Scrapper (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{G}, {T}, Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target artifact.

"The stories tell of a distant time when machines overran the forests, destroying everything that lived. That time will not come again."

Avalanche Riders (World Championship Decks 1999)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

Mogg Sentry (Planeshift)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, this creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn.

"Nobody stands in one place better than a mogg." —Tahngarth

Tribal Golem (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This creature has trample as long as you control a Beast, haste as long as you control a Goblin, first strike as long as you control a Soldier, flying as long as you control a Wizard, and "{B}: Regenerate this creature" as long as you control a Zombie.

Spirit Shackle (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped, put a -0/-2 counter on it.

Commune with Nature (Champions of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Look at the top five cards of your library. You may reveal a creature card from among them and put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Dusk Imp (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying

It despises humans and squirrels and beasts and dwarves and cephalids . . . well, it despises just about everything.

Chromium (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Rampage 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn for each creature blocking it beyond the first.) At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Chromium unless you pay {W}{U}{B}.

Mage's Guile (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Target creature gains shroud until end of turn. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.) Cycling {U} ({U}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

"Next time, don't bother."

Stampeding Serow (Saviors of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Trample At the beginning of your upkeep, return a green creature you control to its owner's hand.

Opal Champion (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When an opponent casts a creature spell, if this permanent is an enchantment, it becomes a 3/3 Knight creature with first strike.

Lava Axe (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Lava Axe deals 5 damage to target player or planeswalker.

Meant to cut through the body and burn straight to the soul.

Acorn Harvest (Torment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Create two 1/1 green Squirrel creature tokens. Flashback—{1}{G}, Pay 3 life. (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Avalanche Riders (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

Accelerated Mutation (Scourge)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the highest mana value among permanents you control.

Its food just got a lot smaller and its stomach a lot bigger.

Plains (Arena League 2000)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {W}.)

Ravenous Rats (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature enters, target opponent discards a card.

Peregrine Mask (Ravnica: City of Guilds)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Equipped creature has defender, flying, and first strike. Equip {2}

The mask confers both the prowess of a falcon and its loyalty.

Verdant Succession (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever a green nontoken creature dies, that creature's controller may search their library for a card with the same name as that creature, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Forest (Asia Pacific Land Program)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {G}.)

Birds of Paradise (Seventh Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Stinkweed Imp (Ravnica: City of Guilds)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a creature, destroy that creature. Dredge 5 (If you would draw a card, you may mill five cards instead. If you do, return this card from your graveyard to your hand.)

Double Deal (Unglued)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Choose another player. Double Deal deals 3 damage to that player. At the beginning of the first upkeep in your next game with that player, Double Deal deals 3 damage to the player.

"I'm facing defeat, . . ."

Crosis's Catacombs (Planeshift)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this land enters, sacrifice it unless you return a non-Lair land you control to its owner's hand. {T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.

Loxodon Mystic (Darksteel)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{W}, {T}: Tap target creature.

As the nim storm across the plains, a lone priest stands in their path. At his silent gesture, the battle line breaks, and the tide turns.

Strength of Cedars (Champions of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number of lands you control.

"No sooner had the beast collapsed under the blows of Takeno's sword than the earth rippled and the creature rose again to face him." —*Battle of Akagi River: A Survivor's Tale*

Dross Crocodile (Fifth Dawn)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

The necrogen may have taken its sight, but it can still taste the fear of its prey.

Avalanche Riders (Time Spiral Timeshifted)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

Nicol Bolas (Chronicles)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Nicol Bolas unless you pay {U}{B}{R}. Whenever Nicol Bolas deals damage to an opponent, that player discards their hand.

Fylgja (Ice Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature This Aura enters with four healing counters on it. Remove a healing counter from this Aura: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to enchanted creature this turn. {2}{W}: Put a healing counter on this Aura.

Horned Turtle (Seventh Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

It doesn't like having visitors . . . unless it's having them for lunch.

Opal Avenger (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When you have 10 or less life, if this permanent is an enchantment, it becomes a 3/5 Soldier creature.

As the sun grew cold in the realm, the statue grew warm.

Ground Seal (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this enchantment enters, draw a card. Cards in graveyards can't be the targets of spells or abilities.

"Let all we have buried be buried forever." —Seton, centaur druid

Angelfire Crusader (Apocalypse)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{R}: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn.

Nothing burns hotter than the fires of holy rage.

Question Elemental? (Unhinged)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Did you know this creature has flying? Are you aware that any time you say something that isn't a question, when a player points out this fact first, they gain control of this creature?

"What the . . . ?"

Abandoned Outpost (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W}. {T}, Sacrifice this land: Add one mana of any color.

Avalanche Riders (Friday Night Magic 2004)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

White Knight (Legions)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

First strike (This creature deals combat damage before creatures without first strike.) Protection from black (This creature can't be blocked, targeted, dealt damage, or enchanted by anything black.)

In the wretched depths of the Grand Coliseum, his soul shines like a single torch blazing in the night.

Jungle Barrier (Apocalypse)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Defender (This creature can't attack.) When this creature enters, draw a card.

A massive pull of mana caused all of Dominaria to pause—Multani had transplanted Yavimaya to Urborg's edge.

Coastal Wizard (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Return this creature and another target creature to their owners' hands. Activate only during your turn, before attackers are declared.

Kingfisher (Urza's Destiny)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying When this creature dies, draw a card.

It's tastiest when served with the fish it stole.

Palladia-Mors (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying, trample At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Palladia-Mors unless you pay {R}{G}{W}.

Alabaster Leech (Invasion)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

White spells you cast cost {W} more to cast.

"Its stones seem to serve a healing function, but removing them intact is an exhausting process." —Tolarian research notes

Avalanche Riders (The List)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Echo {3}{R} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, destroy target land.

Cornered Market (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Players can't cast spells with the same name as a nontoken permanent. Players can't play nonbasic lands with the same name as a nontoken permanent.

Don't step on the livelihood of other vendors, or they may step on you. —Mercadian saying

Spitting Spider (Prophecy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Reach (This creature can block creatures with flying.) Sacrifice a land: This creature deals 1 damage to each creature with flying.

Ronin Houndmaster (Champions of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste Bushido 1 (Whenever this creature blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn.)

Some samurai fell so far out of grace that only dogs would keep them company.

Palladia-Mors (Chronicles)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying, trample At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Palladia-Mors unless you pay {R}{G}{W}.

Dark Offering (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Destroy target nonblack creature. You gain 3 life.

"Our greatest hope has become our enemy's greatest triumph." —Restela, Alaborn marshal

Question Elemental? (Unhinged)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Did you know this creature has flying? Are you aware that any time you say something that isn't a question, when a player points out this fact first, they gain control of this creature?

"What the . . . ?"

Belbe's Percher (Nemesis)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying This creature can block only creatures with flying.

Long and powerful, these birds were used to carry messages to and from the evincar.

Ghastly Remains (Legions)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Amplify 1 (As this creature enters, put a +1/+1 counter on it for each Zombie card you reveal in your hand.) At the beginning of your upkeep, if this card is in your graveyard, you may pay {B}{B}{B}. If you do, return it to your hand.

Wings of Aesthir (Coldsnap Theme Decks)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and has flying and first strike.

"For those of courage, even the sky holds no limit." —Arnjlot Olasson, sky mage

Ashnod's Coupon (Arena League 2004)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Limited time offer. Void where prohibited. Limit one per purchase. Valid only in participating duels. This coupon is nontransferable and invalid if shattered, crumbled, detonated, pillaged, or otherwise disenchanted. Cash value less than 1/20 of a cent. Offer not valid in Quebec, Rhode Island, or where prohibited by law or the DCI.

Battle of Wits (Ninth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

The wizard who reads a thousand books is powerful. The wizard who memorizes a thousand books is insane.

Icatian Javelineers (Anthologies)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This creature enters with a javelin counter on it. {T}, Remove a javelin counter from this creature: It deals 1 damage to any target.

Reki, the History of Kamigawa (The List)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever you cast a legendary spell, draw a card.

"After his death, monks spent ten years transcribing the tattoos from Reki's body and gathering stories from those who spoke with him. Thus the volume you hold was written." —*The History of Kamigawa*

Ashnod's Coupon (Unglued)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Limited time offer. Void where prohibited. Limit one per purchase. Valid only in participating duels. This coupon is nontransferable and invalid if shattered, crumbled, detonated, pillaged, or otherwise disenchanted. Cash value less than 1/20 of a cent. Offer not valid in Quebec, Rhode Island, or where prohibited by law or the DCI.

Crypt Sliver (The List)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

All Slivers have "{T}: Regenerate target Sliver."

"Death couldn't contain the slivers. What made us think we could?" —Riptide Project researcher

Icatian Moneychanger (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This creature enters with three credit counters on it. When this creature enters, it deals 3 damage to you. At the beginning of your upkeep, put a credit counter on this creature. Sacrifice this creature: You gain 1 life for each credit counter on this creature. Activate only during your upkeep.

Princess Lucrezia (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Add {U}.

Peer Pressure (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Choose a creature type. If you control more creatures of that type than each other player, you gain control of all creatures of that type. (This effect lasts indefinitely.)

Plow Under (Urza's Destiny)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Put two target lands on top of their owners' libraries.

To renew the land, plow the land. To destroy the land, do nothing. —Druids' saying

Goblin Pyromancer (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature enters, Goblin creatures get +3/+0 until end of turn. At the beginning of the end step, destroy all Goblins.

"The good news is, we figured out how the wand works. The bad news is, we figured out how the wand works."

Psychatog (Magic Player Rewards 2005)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Discard a card: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn. Exile two cards from your graveyard: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn.

Viashino Cutthroat (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Haste At the beginning of the end step, return this creature to its owner's hand.

"You guys go on ahead. I'll catch up with ya." —Vark, goblin scout, last words

Farrel's Zealot (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever this creature attacks and isn't blocked, you may have it deal 3 damage to target creature. If you do, this creature assigns no combat damage this turn.

Farrel, a former priest, believed Icatia was far too complacent toward the Order of the Ebon Hand.

Mystic Familiar (Torment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Threshold — As long as seven or more cards are in your graveyard, this creature gets +1/+1 and has protection from black.

They soar, and the mystics follow.

Temporal Fissure (Scourge)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Return target permanent to its owner's hand. Storm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each spell cast before it this turn. You may choose new targets for the copies.)

Rukh (Magic Player Rewards 2003)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying

Plains (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {W}.)

Birds of Paradise (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Man of Measure (Unhinged)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

As long as you're shorter than an opponent, Man of Measure gets +0/+1 and has first strike. As long as you're taller than an opponent, Man of Measure gets +1/+0.

You need to be this tall to play this card.

Swamp (Asia Pacific Land Program)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {B}.)

Needleshot Gourna (Legions)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Reach (This creature can block creatures with flying.)

The first aven scout squad returned from Krosa with disturbing stories. The second returned with disturbing casualties.

Nicol Bolas (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Nicol Bolas unless you pay {U}{B}{R}. Whenever Nicol Bolas deals damage to an opponent, that player discards their hand.

Disappear (Urza's Destiny)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature {U}: Return enchanted creature and this Aura to their owners' hands.

If at first you don't succeed, run away and hide.

Elvish Scrapper (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{G}, {T}, Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target artifact.

"The stories tell of a distant time when machines overran the forests, destroying everything that lived. That time will not come again."

Crypt Sliver (Legions)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

All Slivers have "{T}: Regenerate target Sliver."

"Death couldn't contain the slivers. What made us think we could?" —Riptide Project researcher

Elvish Scrapper (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{G}, {T}, Sacrifice this creature: Destroy target artifact.

"The stories tell of a distant time when machines overran the forests, destroying everything that lived. That time will not come again."

Dwarven Driller (Judgment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Destroy target land unless its controller has this creature deal 2 damage to them.

"Drill the planet, it's no trouble: Mining granite, making rubble." —Dwarven drilling song

Spirit Shackle (Fourth Edition Foreign Black Border)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant creature Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped, put a -0/-2 counter on it.

Rain of Tears (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Destroy target land.

Mercadian elitism is reinforced daily by physical position: their neighbors are literally beneath them and are treated accordingly.

Cateran Brute (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{2}, {T}: Search your library for a Mercenary permanent card with mana value 2 or less, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

The Cateran guild prefers to call them "public relations."

Volcanic Hammer (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Volcanic Hammer deals 3 damage to any target.

Fire finds its form in the heat of the forge.

Timid Drake (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying When another creature enters, return this creature to its owner's hand.

It flees from anything that isn't shaped like a cloud.

Puppet's Verdict (The List)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flip a coin. If you win the flip, destroy all creatures with power 2 or less. If you lose the flip, destroy all creatures with power 3 or greater.

"What was heads again?" —Mercadian magistrate

Carrion Rats (Torment)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever this creature attacks or blocks, any player may exile a card from their graveyard. If a player does, this creature assigns no combat damage this turn.

"Just what I need—more competition." —Cabal grave robber

Cyclopean Mummy (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature dies, exile it.

The ritual of plucking out an eye to gain future sight is but a curse that enables the living to see their own deaths.

Ancestral Tribute (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

You gain 2 life for each card in your graveyard. Flashback {9}{W}{W}{W} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Brawl (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Until end of turn, all creatures gain "{T}: This creature deals damage equal to its power to target creature."

Anything can happen when patience is scarce and wine is abundant.

Chromium (Chronicles)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Rampage 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn for each creature blocking it beyond the first.) At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Chromium unless you pay {W}{U}{B}.

Mountain (Asia Pacific Land Program)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {R}.)

Reki, the History of Kamigawa (Saviors of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever you cast a legendary spell, draw a card.

"After his death, monks spent ten years transcribing the tattoos from Reki's body and gathering stories from those who spoke with him. Thus the volume you hold was written." —*The History of Kamigawa*

Baku Altar (Betrayers of Kamigawa)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever you cast a Spirit or Arcane spell, you may put a ki counter on this artifact. {2}, {T}, Remove a ki counter from this artifact: Create a 1/1 colorless Spirit creature token.

Ow (Unglued)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever a creature deals damage to a player, that player may say "Ow" once for each permanent named Ow. If the player doesn't, this enchantment deals 1 damage to them.

Have you ever noticed how some flavor text has no relevance whatsoever to the card it's on?

Psychatog (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Discard a card: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn. Exile two cards from your graveyard: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn.

Castle (Seventh Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Untapped creatures you control get +0/+2.

". . . Our castle's strength Will laugh a siege to scorn." —William Shakespeare, *Macbeth*

Seasoned Marshal (Seventh Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Whenever this creature attacks, you may tap target creature.

He reads the battlefield like a map, always seeking the shortest route to victory.

Zuran Spellcaster (Ice Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: This creature deals 1 damage to any target.

"A mage must be precise as well as potent; cautious, as well as clever." —Zur the Enchanter

Thallid (Fallen Empires)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, put a spore counter on this creature. Remove three spore counters from this creature: Create a 1/1 green Saproling creature token.

Dark Offering (Starter 1999)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Destroy target nonblack creature. You gain 3 life.

"Our greatest hope has become our enemy's greatest triumph." —Court counselor

Psychatog (World Championship Decks 2002)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Discard a card: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn. Exile two cards from your graveyard: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn.

Extravagant Spirit (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice this creature unless you pay {1} for each card in your hand.

The fewer your possessions, the fewer your worries.

Reincarnation (Legends)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Choose target creature. When that creature dies this turn, return a creature card from its owner's graveyard to the battlefield under the control of that creature's owner.

Spitting Spider (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Reach (This creature can block creatures with flying.) Sacrifice a land: This creature deals 1 damage to each creature with flying.

Island (Asia Pacific Land Program)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

({T}: Add {U}.)

Ghosthelm Courier (Onslaught)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

You may choose not to untap this creature during your untap step. {2}{U}, {T}: Target Wizard creature gets +2/+2 and has shroud for as long as this creature remains tapped. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.)

Ley Druid (Ninth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

{T}: Untap target land.

After years of training, the druid becomes one with nature, drawing power from the land and returning it when needed.

Birds of Paradise (World Championship Decks 2001)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Righteous Fury (Portal Second Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Destroy all tapped creatures. You gain 2 life for each creature destroyed this way.

Animal Boneyard (Odyssey)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Enchant land Enchanted land has "{T}, Sacrifice a creature: You gain life equal to the sacrificed creature's toughness."

"The animal spirits are the Ancestor's grandchildren. Remember them." —Mystic elder

Puppet's Verdict (Mercadian Masques)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flip a coin. If you win the flip, destroy all creatures with power 2 or less. If you lose the flip, destroy all creatures with power 3 or greater.

"What was heads again?" —Mercadian magistrate

Raven Familiar (Urza's Legacy)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying Echo {2}{U} (At the beginning of your upkeep, if this came under your control since the beginning of your last upkeep, sacrifice it unless you pay its echo cost.) When this creature enters, look at the top three cards of your library. Put one of them into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.

Dusk Imp (Eighth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying

It despises humans and squirrels and beasts and dwarves and cephalids . . . well, it despises just about everything.

Birds of Paradise (Seventh Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying {T}: Add one mana of any color.

Crusading Knight (Invasion)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Protection from black This creature gets +1/+1 for each Swamp your opponents control.

"My only dream is to destroy the nightmares of others."

Winter's Chill (Ice Age)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Cast this spell only during combat before blockers are declared. X can't be greater than the number of snow lands you control. Choose X target attacking creatures. For each of those creatures, its controller may pay {1} or {2}. If that player doesn't, destroy that creature at end of combat. If that player pays only {1}, prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to and dealt by that creature this combat.

Guardian Idol (Fifth Dawn)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

This artifact enters tapped. {T}: Add {C}. {2}: This artifact becomes a 2/2 Golem artifact creature until end of turn.

Nicol Bolas (Time Spiral Timeshifted)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Nicol Bolas unless you pay {U}{B}{R}. Whenever Nicol Bolas deals damage to an opponent, that player discards their hand.

Screaming Fury (Fifth Dawn)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

Target creature gets +5/+0 and gains haste until end of turn.

He's got an axe to grind.

Cyclopean Mummy (Renaissance)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

When this creature dies, exile it.

Battle of Wits (Ninth Edition)
Edward P. Beard, Jr.

At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 200 or more cards in your library, you win the game.

The wizard who reads a thousand books is powerful. The wizard who memorizes a thousand books is insane.